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1. There is no such thing as child-proofing your house.
2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them
with roller blades, they can ignite.
3. A 4 years-old's voice is louder than 200 adults in a
crowded restaurant.
4. Quiet does not necessarily mean don't worry.
5. Always look in the oven before you turn it on.
6. Baseballs make marks on ceilings.
7. You shouldn't throw baseballs at the ceiling fan when on.
8. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
9. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
10. VCR's do not eject PB&J sandwiches.
11. When you hear the toilet flush and the words "Uh-oh;" it's
already too late.
12. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
13. A six year old can start a fire with a flint rock despite
a 36-year-old man saying it can only be done in the movies.
14. A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast
day.
15. If you use a waterbed as home plate while wearing baseball
cleats it does not leak - it explodes.
16. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq
foot house 4 inches deep.
17. Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a
4-year-old.
18. Duplos will not.
19. Play Dough and Microwave should never be used in the same
sentence.
20. Super glue is forever.
21. McGyver can teach us many things we don't want to know.
22. No matter how much Jello you put in a swimming pool you
still can't walk on water.
23. Pool filters do not like Jello.
24. A good sense of humor will get you through most problems
in life (unfortunately, mostly in retrospect).
Send, comments, suggestions, trivia questions(!) to Lon Phillips
bravenet.com